The baby moves/kicks more now.
I've been pretty gental on my stomach so far. However during the ultrasound the technician was pushing harder than I normally would on my stomach (not so hard that it hurts) to get the images he needs. I think until the ultrasound the baby only feels like he was in this big water void and he moves sometimes. Very gental movements. So the movements I felt until then was just small flutters. Like a small finger tapping. But after the ultrasound, the baby must learned that there are things beyond this big void he is in and he moves more to get an reaction or something. Like "hey, what's going on out there?!" The movements are so much more noticable that it takes me by surprise sometimes. He's definitely moving more too.
Friday, September 22, 2006
Thursday, September 21, 2006
Ultrasound
Noel came with me to the ultrasound. The technician was nice. He smeared this gel thing all over my stomach and then went to work. It's just surreal that ultrasound can see so much. I read on the American Pregnancy Association that the baby should be 7 inches long now. The technician went to take all the important views the doctor needs. The head size, the heart beat, organs, spine and limbs. The baby's head was up and feet was down at the time. Finally he took a profile view for us to take home. First word out of Noel's mouth was "he looks like Casper".
I guess it finally hit me after this second ultrasound that I am actually having a baby. There's an actual being is growing inside of me. It still feel so surreal. Now I must face my current most fear enemy: the labor process.
I guess it finally hit me after this second ultrasound that I am actually having a baby. There's an actual being is growing inside of me. It still feel so surreal. Now I must face my current most fear enemy: the labor process.
Sneezing is a two hand effort now...
Sneezing has become a two hand effort ever since I got pregnant. Now I need one hand to cover my mouth and one hand to hold my stomach in. So when I am driving and I only have one free hand, I just don't get enough time to decide which one to do and sometimes it just doens't get to either one...
Sunday, September 17, 2006
Best Uni I Ever Had
We finally tried the good japanese restaurant near us that we didn't know about: Sushi Tomi. We had the best Uni (sea urchin) we've ever had in our lives!! I am not exaggerating. I liked uni okay until recently. In fact, I was not as impressed by uni's taste as much as Noel. But after trying some good uni at Blue Ribbbon Sushi in NY, I was convinced that when it's good quality, it tastes good. This uni from Sushi Tomi was better then Blue Ribbon's Sushi's. It was so good that we ordered another one. I had to stop Noel from talking when I was eating the second one so I can devote all my senses to experience that good uni.
We even went back the second day hoping to get the uni as good but we were prepared because restaurant don't get deliveries on the weekend. So we were aware we can be getting the same uni but a day old....which turned out to be the case.
We just hope that this is not a singular experience and we'll be able to experience that great uni again.
Yes, I shouldn't have eaten it in the first place, but we've decided that not eating raw fish was too hard for me. I mean, I can resist when nobody else is ordering raw fish. But when Noel orders raw fish, I can't resist. Besides, it's more of a precaution then a known no-no like alcohol or cigarette. We never eat at second rate sushi places, so that should decrease the chance a lot...this was one thing I didn't think I could do without for 9+ months but now that we made a different decision, I think I'll fair a lot better. Some how restricting food makes me want it more...
Search continues for another perfect uni....
We even went back the second day hoping to get the uni as good but we were prepared because restaurant don't get deliveries on the weekend. So we were aware we can be getting the same uni but a day old....which turned out to be the case.
We just hope that this is not a singular experience and we'll be able to experience that great uni again.
Yes, I shouldn't have eaten it in the first place, but we've decided that not eating raw fish was too hard for me. I mean, I can resist when nobody else is ordering raw fish. But when Noel orders raw fish, I can't resist. Besides, it's more of a precaution then a known no-no like alcohol or cigarette. We never eat at second rate sushi places, so that should decrease the chance a lot...this was one thing I didn't think I could do without for 9+ months but now that we made a different decision, I think I'll fair a lot better. Some how restricting food makes me want it more...
Search continues for another perfect uni....
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
Advanture with Homemade Wonton
Okay, the wonton didn't turn out well. Mostly due to the wrong ingredient put in:
First of all, I got the bottles mixed up so I put in black vinager instead of soy sauce.
Secondly, due to not labling my spices, I am not sure if I added corn starch or cream of tartar. so when the cooked wonton didn't turn out a bit sticky which the corn starch is suppose to help do, I had my suspecion that I might have put in the wrong thing. I should have left it out like Daisy told me. Next time.
Noel was very nice told me that it didn't taste bad. I wanted it to taste awesome, not just okay...oh well, next time.
First of all, I got the bottles mixed up so I put in black vinager instead of soy sauce.
Secondly, due to not labling my spices, I am not sure if I added corn starch or cream of tartar. so when the cooked wonton didn't turn out a bit sticky which the corn starch is suppose to help do, I had my suspecion that I might have put in the wrong thing. I should have left it out like Daisy told me. Next time.
Noel was very nice told me that it didn't taste bad. I wanted it to taste awesome, not just okay...oh well, next time.
Monday, August 28, 2006
Visiting Taiwan
Some how visiting Taiwan this time felt very different. I was able to pay more attention to what interests me instead of following my mother's full schedule or translating for Noel. I still rather have Noel with me than anything but I realized without having to translate, I was able to pay more attention to details of places and things.
Day 1 (Wednesday)
Dad picked me up from the airport and took me to grandparents place. I called mom and told her the news, then I presented grandparents with the note in Japanese Noel wrote. I think it took grandpa a bit to realized what the note was saying and it still took a bit to sink in. Dad and I then went to hang out with third gugu on my father side (plus her husband and son) and then later hooked up with the da-gugu on my father side. The whole family went shopping for maternity cloths for me. I felt very awkward because I really do not enjoy shopping with other people. It felt too imposing on them. I only like imposing Noel and he's the only one that doesn't care too much about shopping, especially when he's tired. Dad drove me back to grandparents to sleep that night.
Day 2 (Thursday)
Grandma went out early in the morning and bought lots of things from the market. Now that I am pregnant has finally sink in, she's prepared to cook me a whole lot of food that's very nutritious. I explained to her that because I am pregnant my digestive system is not good; i.e. I digest very slow and cannot eat a lot. She did not understand what I told her. I explained it to grandpa hoping he can help me explain it to grandma and that didn't seem to help her understand either. The rest of the day was to battle her with food. In the evening we went to eat dinner with grandpa's oldest brother (who's not alive any more)'s children. Although they were not my ideal crowd to entertain with because they are all my elders, I did have a good time learning some family history and getting who's who straight.
Day 3 (Friday)
The minute I woke up I started looking forward to dad picking me up. It was just so hard dealing with grandma. I can deal with all other impositions that comes with staying with them except for the fact that she's forcing me to eat all the time!! I know Noel would say "just don't eat" but she gets offended and she gets mad. I could see her mental problem getting worse and worse because I did not eat as much as she wished. I think I woke father up when I called him. He finally rescued me around noon.
We drove down south with his friend and her sister. They were both very nice and kept on buying me things but not forcing me to eat! How refreshing! We took our time driving down and toured the rest stops which were like mini malls full of famous local products. We got to Tainan and dad checked me in to the best motel I've ever been. It was newly built and cost only about $50. It felt just a bit shy of a luxury hotel! So awesome. We went out to eat some famous southern stuff (coffin bread, some fish thing) and I was looking forward to a great night of sleep without having to worry about my grandparents next to me.
Day 4 (Saturday)
I slept really late and we went to have lunch and met a classmate of my dad's and then headed toward HuaLian pretty late. Couldn't see much view because the day was dark already but was able to stop by to get some local Taiwan fruit which I do not know how to say it in English. The best I can do is tell you the fruit looks like the Buddha head.
At one point my stomach did not feel well and there was nothing along the highway. So dad stopped by a small police station and borrowed the bathroom for me. It's my first time going to a police station just for the bathroom.
We got to HuaLian after midnight and all the hotels were booked. We were able to find a private home renting rooms out and took refuge there.
Day 5 (Sunday)
We went to have the famous HuaLian wanton and it was sooooo good. The whole shop only sells one thing and everything about the wonton soup was great. It's good enough that I'll make effort to come back to Hualian for it.
We then went to my childhood nanny's Lee mama's place. I haven't seen her for over 17 years! I saw her before I left Taiwan but that was it. I am pretty amazed that we are still in touch. She welcomed us warmly and insist on cooking us meal. We wanted to get on our way so we have some day light to see the sights but was not able to. We reminisced some and ate her food and then finally left Hualian at around 3pm.
I had forgotten or never realized how beautiful the east coast of Taiwan is! I think it's more impressive then Highway 1 in CA. I definitely would love to bring Noel here. Although I find the coastal highway nerve racking.
We took the short cut and went to the newly opened, longest tunnel in Asia back to Taipei, which was full of traffic. We entertained ourselves by joking a lot about the traffic. Dad found me a hotel near the shopping center that I wanted to be, which is also next to a subway station that has two subway lines.
Day 6 (Monday)
Dad picked me to around noon to get luggage from grandparents place. I knew it would be hard to leave the place without eating some of her cooking. She guilts me by telling me that she bought all that nutritious food for me and I don't eat it. So I stayed in hour or so to eat.
Met up with Lee mama's young son and second son in Taipei. It's been so long since I last saw them. I guess I don't really know how these "brother" are like any more now that they are adults. The third brother is a bit more aloof then I expected. I guess that explains why he's more in to asking me about updated photos then updated news. We went to visit second brother's house and I had a good time chatting with second brother's wife. She was very warm and friendly. I think she kinda rescued the two brothers. I guess it's awkward to get to know someone you knew so long ago.
Day 7 (Tuesday)
I went shopping by myself. It was what I liked the most. I cannot truly express what I like because these nice relatives (dad and aunts) keeps on buying things for me. Sometimes they are just too expensive so I don't look at them even though I would like to. This was my chance. I find most chinese sales people annoying because they feel the need to keep on talking as you look at things, as if they want to use all the time and chance they have to influence you to buy the item. Not giving you a chance to think on your own so you might change your mind about buying it. It's the biggest turn offs for me. And when you decide not to buy, they have the saddest look on their face as if maybe hiding those sad looks has never occur to them. More expensive shopping places don't do that to you.
It was great visiting Da-Ayi, grandma and shiau-Ayi, Jeffrey, Sharon and Jason. Jason is so adorable and he looks so much like Jeffrey. Da-ayi prepared a wonderful meal with the best fish I ever had. A lot of veggies and other healthy seafood too. We did not eat dinner with rice which was weird in a chinese household but I think it's just healthier for everybody. Chatted with Jeffrey a bit after he came home and he's still adjusting. He looks like a happy father. Spoke to Sharon about her pregnancy and raising an infant. She's a very nice lady.
Shiau-ayi took me to mother's second brother's home because grandma lives there. It was great to see second gio-ma, my cousins Daphne, Jay and his wife. I think Jay and wife were tired so they didn't not seem as excited but Daphne always has a lot of energy. She is going to do her master's degree part time which is great. At one point, while sitting next to me, grandma lift her butt cheek near me and farted loudly and then sat back down like as if nothing had happened. I had to stop myself from gasping at what just happened. I guess her generation just grew up with different etiquettes.
Day 8 (Wednesday)
I had lunch with Grandparents and some relatives including the taxi uncle and his kids. Well, two out of his three kids. My cousin shiau-gene completed his mandatory military service and is now working as an apprentice to a chef. His sister is still very petite has a boyfriend that she was too shy to tell me (her mother told me).
I went to the old house in wan-hwa that grandparents used to live. Where I spent most of my younger school years because my elementary was just behind the house. I would go to grandma's after school and get some snack, do my homework and just hang out there until mom came home. I miss that place. It's all renovated now to a historical site and I am sad to see that grandparents house is no longer there but the grocery store in front of the house still has it's frame and the address number on a plate stating that.
Dad picked me up and then we went to the Gee-Long harbor. It has a huge Goddess of Mercy at the temple which had a good view of the harbor. We then went to the famous Gee-Long night market and tried out some local eats. Dad got some famous pineapple cake and green bean cake for me to take back to Noel.
We then went to visit great grandmother who's 97 now. Her health has deteriorated a bit after falling ill last year. She now goes through a period of sleeping for a couple of days and then awake for a couple of days. The day we went she was in a sleepy mode and tells us to leave her along. It was good seeing her though.
We then went to visit Small-gugu's place and I could see that everybody was very proud of shiau uncle who just became a principle in elementary school. He's now the youngest principle in Taipei at age 41! All the gugu's were there to meet up. It's nice to have dad together with rest of them.
Day 9 (Thursday)
I had afternoon tea with cousin Liang Huie, her husband and her son. I just realized she's only 6 years younger then mom but because she's in a different generation she calls mom auntie. It was nice catching up with her and meeting her husband. Her husband is very nice and he has many intriguing questions for me. Their son did not have such a good time because he was bored. I made a note to myself to always have something for the kid to do in the future. Let it be a drawing book or a reading book or something that can engage him.
I ended my last night in Taipei by having dinner with Second gio-gio and gio-ma and shiau-ayi and yi-tzan. It was so interesting meeting these elders now that I am an adult. I think it's the first time I see them all for a long time except for shiau-ayi who came to visit me last year. Shiau-yitzan gain respect for me and realized I am an adult from the aunt lily accident. I think that's because his English ability is pretty good (having an non-chinese son-in-law requires that). We had pleasant conversations together. I realized how amazing second gio-ma is. She's truly an amazing woman. I think second gio-gio still sees me as a child and his lectures are still the same.
Day 10 (Friday)
Dad drop me to the airport but not without stopping by the famous soy milk place to get me some breakfast. It's always sad to say goodbyes. I saw in dad's eye that he was a bit scared and but mostly excited for me to become a parent myself.
The flight back wasn't so bad. It was a short flight to Manila and then the long wait at the airport but that did not bother me because I was so excited I'll see my husband again soon. The flight from Manila to SFO was decent because nobody sat in the middle of the three seats so we were not as cramped.
Overall I did not get enough of the chinese treats. I still miss it when I came back. Oh well, next time...
Day 1 (Wednesday)
Dad picked me up from the airport and took me to grandparents place. I called mom and told her the news, then I presented grandparents with the note in Japanese Noel wrote. I think it took grandpa a bit to realized what the note was saying and it still took a bit to sink in. Dad and I then went to hang out with third gugu on my father side (plus her husband and son) and then later hooked up with the da-gugu on my father side. The whole family went shopping for maternity cloths for me. I felt very awkward because I really do not enjoy shopping with other people. It felt too imposing on them. I only like imposing Noel and he's the only one that doesn't care too much about shopping, especially when he's tired. Dad drove me back to grandparents to sleep that night.
Day 2 (Thursday)
Grandma went out early in the morning and bought lots of things from the market. Now that I am pregnant has finally sink in, she's prepared to cook me a whole lot of food that's very nutritious. I explained to her that because I am pregnant my digestive system is not good; i.e. I digest very slow and cannot eat a lot. She did not understand what I told her. I explained it to grandpa hoping he can help me explain it to grandma and that didn't seem to help her understand either. The rest of the day was to battle her with food. In the evening we went to eat dinner with grandpa's oldest brother (who's not alive any more)'s children. Although they were not my ideal crowd to entertain with because they are all my elders, I did have a good time learning some family history and getting who's who straight.
Day 3 (Friday)
The minute I woke up I started looking forward to dad picking me up. It was just so hard dealing with grandma. I can deal with all other impositions that comes with staying with them except for the fact that she's forcing me to eat all the time!! I know Noel would say "just don't eat" but she gets offended and she gets mad. I could see her mental problem getting worse and worse because I did not eat as much as she wished. I think I woke father up when I called him. He finally rescued me around noon.
We drove down south with his friend and her sister. They were both very nice and kept on buying me things but not forcing me to eat! How refreshing! We took our time driving down and toured the rest stops which were like mini malls full of famous local products. We got to Tainan and dad checked me in to the best motel I've ever been. It was newly built and cost only about $50. It felt just a bit shy of a luxury hotel! So awesome. We went out to eat some famous southern stuff (coffin bread, some fish thing) and I was looking forward to a great night of sleep without having to worry about my grandparents next to me.
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| From 2006 August T... |
Day 4 (Saturday)
I slept really late and we went to have lunch and met a classmate of my dad's and then headed toward HuaLian pretty late. Couldn't see much view because the day was dark already but was able to stop by to get some local Taiwan fruit which I do not know how to say it in English. The best I can do is tell you the fruit looks like the Buddha head.
At one point my stomach did not feel well and there was nothing along the highway. So dad stopped by a small police station and borrowed the bathroom for me. It's my first time going to a police station just for the bathroom.
We got to HuaLian after midnight and all the hotels were booked. We were able to find a private home renting rooms out and took refuge there.
Day 5 (Sunday)
We went to have the famous HuaLian wanton and it was sooooo good. The whole shop only sells one thing and everything about the wonton soup was great. It's good enough that I'll make effort to come back to Hualian for it.
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| From 2006 August T... |
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| From 2006 August T... |
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| From 2006 August T... |
We then went to my childhood nanny's Lee mama's place. I haven't seen her for over 17 years! I saw her before I left Taiwan but that was it. I am pretty amazed that we are still in touch. She welcomed us warmly and insist on cooking us meal. We wanted to get on our way so we have some day light to see the sights but was not able to. We reminisced some and ate her food and then finally left Hualian at around 3pm.
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| From 2006 August T... |
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| From 2006 August T... |
I had forgotten or never realized how beautiful the east coast of Taiwan is! I think it's more impressive then Highway 1 in CA. I definitely would love to bring Noel here. Although I find the coastal highway nerve racking.
 |
| From 2006 August T... |
We took the short cut and went to the newly opened, longest tunnel in Asia back to Taipei, which was full of traffic. We entertained ourselves by joking a lot about the traffic. Dad found me a hotel near the shopping center that I wanted to be, which is also next to a subway station that has two subway lines.
Day 6 (Monday)
Dad picked me to around noon to get luggage from grandparents place. I knew it would be hard to leave the place without eating some of her cooking. She guilts me by telling me that she bought all that nutritious food for me and I don't eat it. So I stayed in hour or so to eat.
Met up with Lee mama's young son and second son in Taipei. It's been so long since I last saw them. I guess I don't really know how these "brother" are like any more now that they are adults. The third brother is a bit more aloof then I expected. I guess that explains why he's more in to asking me about updated photos then updated news. We went to visit second brother's house and I had a good time chatting with second brother's wife. She was very warm and friendly. I think she kinda rescued the two brothers. I guess it's awkward to get to know someone you knew so long ago.
Day 7 (Tuesday)
I went shopping by myself. It was what I liked the most. I cannot truly express what I like because these nice relatives (dad and aunts) keeps on buying things for me. Sometimes they are just too expensive so I don't look at them even though I would like to. This was my chance. I find most chinese sales people annoying because they feel the need to keep on talking as you look at things, as if they want to use all the time and chance they have to influence you to buy the item. Not giving you a chance to think on your own so you might change your mind about buying it. It's the biggest turn offs for me. And when you decide not to buy, they have the saddest look on their face as if maybe hiding those sad looks has never occur to them. More expensive shopping places don't do that to you.
It was great visiting Da-Ayi, grandma and shiau-Ayi, Jeffrey, Sharon and Jason. Jason is so adorable and he looks so much like Jeffrey. Da-ayi prepared a wonderful meal with the best fish I ever had. A lot of veggies and other healthy seafood too. We did not eat dinner with rice which was weird in a chinese household but I think it's just healthier for everybody. Chatted with Jeffrey a bit after he came home and he's still adjusting. He looks like a happy father. Spoke to Sharon about her pregnancy and raising an infant. She's a very nice lady.
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| From 2006 August T... |
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| From 2006 August T... |
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| From 2006 August T... |
Shiau-ayi took me to mother's second brother's home because grandma lives there. It was great to see second gio-ma, my cousins Daphne, Jay and his wife. I think Jay and wife were tired so they didn't not seem as excited but Daphne always has a lot of energy. She is going to do her master's degree part time which is great. At one point, while sitting next to me, grandma lift her butt cheek near me and farted loudly and then sat back down like as if nothing had happened. I had to stop myself from gasping at what just happened. I guess her generation just grew up with different etiquettes.
 |
| From 2006 August T... |
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| From 2006 August T... |
Day 8 (Wednesday)
I had lunch with Grandparents and some relatives including the taxi uncle and his kids. Well, two out of his three kids. My cousin shiau-gene completed his mandatory military service and is now working as an apprentice to a chef. His sister is still very petite has a boyfriend that she was too shy to tell me (her mother told me).
 |
| From 2006 August T... |
I went to the old house in wan-hwa that grandparents used to live. Where I spent most of my younger school years because my elementary was just behind the house. I would go to grandma's after school and get some snack, do my homework and just hang out there until mom came home. I miss that place. It's all renovated now to a historical site and I am sad to see that grandparents house is no longer there but the grocery store in front of the house still has it's frame and the address number on a plate stating that.
 |
| From 2006 August T... |
 |
| From 2006 August T... |
 |
| From 2006 August T... |
Dad picked me up and then we went to the Gee-Long harbor. It has a huge Goddess of Mercy at the temple which had a good view of the harbor. We then went to the famous Gee-Long night market and tried out some local eats. Dad got some famous pineapple cake and green bean cake for me to take back to Noel.
We then went to visit great grandmother who's 97 now. Her health has deteriorated a bit after falling ill last year. She now goes through a period of sleeping for a couple of days and then awake for a couple of days. The day we went she was in a sleepy mode and tells us to leave her along. It was good seeing her though.
 |
| From 2006 August T... |
We then went to visit Small-gugu's place and I could see that everybody was very proud of shiau uncle who just became a principle in elementary school. He's now the youngest principle in Taipei at age 41! All the gugu's were there to meet up. It's nice to have dad together with rest of them.
 |
| From 2006 August T... |
Day 9 (Thursday)
I had afternoon tea with cousin Liang Huie, her husband and her son. I just realized she's only 6 years younger then mom but because she's in a different generation she calls mom auntie. It was nice catching up with her and meeting her husband. Her husband is very nice and he has many intriguing questions for me. Their son did not have such a good time because he was bored. I made a note to myself to always have something for the kid to do in the future. Let it be a drawing book or a reading book or something that can engage him.
I ended my last night in Taipei by having dinner with Second gio-gio and gio-ma and shiau-ayi and yi-tzan. It was so interesting meeting these elders now that I am an adult. I think it's the first time I see them all for a long time except for shiau-ayi who came to visit me last year. Shiau-yitzan gain respect for me and realized I am an adult from the aunt lily accident. I think that's because his English ability is pretty good (having an non-chinese son-in-law requires that). We had pleasant conversations together. I realized how amazing second gio-ma is. She's truly an amazing woman. I think second gio-gio still sees me as a child and his lectures are still the same.
 |
| From 2006 August T... |
Day 10 (Friday)
Dad drop me to the airport but not without stopping by the famous soy milk place to get me some breakfast. It's always sad to say goodbyes. I saw in dad's eye that he was a bit scared and but mostly excited for me to become a parent myself.
 |
| From 2006 August T... |
The flight back wasn't so bad. It was a short flight to Manila and then the long wait at the airport but that did not bother me because I was so excited I'll see my husband again soon. The flight from Manila to SFO was decent because nobody sat in the middle of the three seats so we were not as cramped.
Overall I did not get enough of the chinese treats. I still miss it when I came back. Oh well, next time...
Saturday, March 18, 2006
Aunt Lily and Uncle Jim's accident
They got in to a bad car accident on Tuesday, March 14 2006 in Laytonville CA, about 200 miles north of us. I am not sure how information was passed around but when it finally go to Judy, she quickly remember that I was close by and proposed that I can go there to help them. I found out too late on Wednesday night so I didn't depart until Thursday morning.
Driving to Santa Rosa wasn't too bad. I think we might have been to this region of CA when we went to Calistoga. Driving up to Willits the next day was a bit more then I can usually do. However the opera on ipod help the drive easier. I am glad to see both of them. They keep on saying they don't really need people here because the hospital staffs are great and that they sleep all the time. However, I just think that if I was in their situation, I would love to see some familiar faces and know that someone is near to help me and take care of things I am worrying about. I don't want to interfere with their recovering so I think even just visiting them a little bit each day can help with their spirit.
Driving this much makes me realize how much Dad drives each week. He drives between north and south of Taiwan once or twice a week for business. While he says he's used to it, I can't help but think it still gets tiring for him. This also makes me realize him driving so much increases his chance of accident. I guess one must do what one needs for work but I will remind him to be more careful.
I am very glad I am making mom happy too. She's glad I can help her sister in their needs. Plus she's been seen as the black sheep of the family and always someone that people worry about. I am glad I can be useful which makes her look good.
I am also glad Sylvia and Liang are coming to help out. More then one person would make it easier to take care of both of them so far apart. While driving the round trip is doable (it's similar to us doing the manhattan to hamptons drive with the guys in the city) but doing it daily might be too much.
Thank goodness for someone with higher power looking over them. I am so glad they are recovering well. They are so sweet that they worry more about each other. I do my best to keep each other informed and ease their minds. They would be marry 35 years this June. How wonderful and sweet...
Driving to Santa Rosa wasn't too bad. I think we might have been to this region of CA when we went to Calistoga. Driving up to Willits the next day was a bit more then I can usually do. However the opera on ipod help the drive easier. I am glad to see both of them. They keep on saying they don't really need people here because the hospital staffs are great and that they sleep all the time. However, I just think that if I was in their situation, I would love to see some familiar faces and know that someone is near to help me and take care of things I am worrying about. I don't want to interfere with their recovering so I think even just visiting them a little bit each day can help with their spirit.
Driving this much makes me realize how much Dad drives each week. He drives between north and south of Taiwan once or twice a week for business. While he says he's used to it, I can't help but think it still gets tiring for him. This also makes me realize him driving so much increases his chance of accident. I guess one must do what one needs for work but I will remind him to be more careful.
I am very glad I am making mom happy too. She's glad I can help her sister in their needs. Plus she's been seen as the black sheep of the family and always someone that people worry about. I am glad I can be useful which makes her look good.
I am also glad Sylvia and Liang are coming to help out. More then one person would make it easier to take care of both of them so far apart. While driving the round trip is doable (it's similar to us doing the manhattan to hamptons drive with the guys in the city) but doing it daily might be too much.
Thank goodness for someone with higher power looking over them. I am so glad they are recovering well. They are so sweet that they worry more about each other. I do my best to keep each other informed and ease their minds. They would be marry 35 years this June. How wonderful and sweet...
Thursday, March 09, 2006
The Academy Award Message
It's been said the whole Acamedy award was on an anti-dvd-pro-movie-theatre campaign through out the show. I don't disagree that some movie is best experienced in the theatre, but dvds (legal or not) is not the reason I haven't been going to the theatre. Hollywood makes crap these days. They needs to stop pushing movie out like cheap products. They need to make quality stuff. Yes, I love Ang Lee. Yes, partly because he's also Taiwanese. I love how it takes him a while to produce but he produces good stuff.
They make so much money already. They need to step back and realize that. Stop the whole cycle of "I need to make more money right away!" Enjoy a little. Relax a little. Then go back to make some good stuff.
I want to make a list of favorite moments in movies. They give me similar high as my favorite moments in opera...
They make so much money already. They need to step back and realize that. Stop the whole cycle of "I need to make more money right away!" Enjoy a little. Relax a little. Then go back to make some good stuff.
I want to make a list of favorite moments in movies. They give me similar high as my favorite moments in opera...
Monday, February 13, 2006
So many things, so little time
I just feel so overwhelmed by everything I want to do. I need to back up of the computer working. Need to get knitting stuff update so the info are not in so many little pieces of paper. And there are other to do's too...Knitting and reading are just in the way of doing those too...
I finally connected the newly bought seagate external backup server. While the sales person said "yes" to my question: "Can I back up all my computers at home (mac and pc) to the same drive)?" , I am finding out the real answer is other wise. After puzzling over the instructions so many times and experimenting on my own:
I learned that if the drive is formatted for microsoft file system, my laptop can pick it up and show it in the windows explorer properly. The mac will be able to read it but it won't be able to back up to it. If the drive is formatted to mac file system format, then the mac will be able to back up to it but my laptop won't pick it up. And apparently I cannot divide the drive to different partitions and format each partition differently.
So I decided the right thing to do is format it in microsoft format and back up my laptop because it's the oldest and needs backup the most. After making it the proper format (via mac help), the program told me it would be take an hour and half. I don't like why it will take so long but that makes it difficult to backup on the regular basis. I just can't figure out how to back up specific directories in the pc (it makes me back up the whole drive). This is puzzling because I am able to do that in mac.... *sigh* Another reason to get mac for my next computer...
I want to blog about all those other things. I want to start putting my knitting stuff in the blog along with the photo, but I am just so discourage to do that because I just don't feel safe making all those effort and not be able to back up the work. I still need to figure out how to do category in the blog so I don't have to keep ten thousand blogs. Wish google blogger does it already...*sigh*
I owe so many people pictures...*sigh* so many things to do....
I finally connected the newly bought seagate external backup server. While the sales person said "yes" to my question: "Can I back up all my computers at home (mac and pc) to the same drive)?" , I am finding out the real answer is other wise. After puzzling over the instructions so many times and experimenting on my own:
I learned that if the drive is formatted for microsoft file system, my laptop can pick it up and show it in the windows explorer properly. The mac will be able to read it but it won't be able to back up to it. If the drive is formatted to mac file system format, then the mac will be able to back up to it but my laptop won't pick it up. And apparently I cannot divide the drive to different partitions and format each partition differently.
So I decided the right thing to do is format it in microsoft format and back up my laptop because it's the oldest and needs backup the most. After making it the proper format (via mac help), the program told me it would be take an hour and half. I don't like why it will take so long but that makes it difficult to backup on the regular basis. I just can't figure out how to back up specific directories in the pc (it makes me back up the whole drive). This is puzzling because I am able to do that in mac.... *sigh* Another reason to get mac for my next computer...
I want to blog about all those other things. I want to start putting my knitting stuff in the blog along with the photo, but I am just so discourage to do that because I just don't feel safe making all those effort and not be able to back up the work. I still need to figure out how to do category in the blog so I don't have to keep ten thousand blogs. Wish google blogger does it already...*sigh*
I owe so many people pictures...*sigh* so many things to do....
Saturday, December 17, 2005
Beethovan's struggle
On fighting custody of his brother's son:
He wanted to be the father he never had, but he turned out to be the father he had.
It's hard for us to not become the parent we did not like because we only learn parenting from the subtle things we encounter with our parents. The only way to break the mode is to not focus on what you want but what the child needs.
He wanted to be the father he never had, but he turned out to be the father he had.
It's hard for us to not become the parent we did not like because we only learn parenting from the subtle things we encounter with our parents. The only way to break the mode is to not focus on what you want but what the child needs.
Thursday, December 01, 2005
TV is evil
TV is evil.
I am so unproductive after I turn the TV on. Even when I am all TVed out it's hard for me to turn it off. It's like a drug. I've learn to combat that somewhat with watching educational stuff (History, Discovery channel) and switch to the music channels (it's really neat, like radio without commercial). But for most part I just get so addicted.
I've been resisting turning it on. Convinced myself to turn it on later and later each day. Tell me self to resist the urge each time. I am just amazed how productive and how much I accomplish when the TV doesn't get turned on. I think I've finally got it under control.
Plus I always feel dumber after watch TV for more then an hour and half. I can physically feel I got dumber.
I am so unproductive after I turn the TV on. Even when I am all TVed out it's hard for me to turn it off. It's like a drug. I've learn to combat that somewhat with watching educational stuff (History, Discovery channel) and switch to the music channels (it's really neat, like radio without commercial). But for most part I just get so addicted.
I've been resisting turning it on. Convinced myself to turn it on later and later each day. Tell me self to resist the urge each time. I am just amazed how productive and how much I accomplish when the TV doesn't get turned on. I think I've finally got it under control.
Plus I always feel dumber after watch TV for more then an hour and half. I can physically feel I got dumber.
Thursday, November 17, 2005
Vivian is mad at me
I found out she was reallly mad at me today. She was mad at the fact that I call her a "freaking child". I realized I call her that when we were talking about her situation with this guy where she is the other women. He clearly doesn't treat her right. He's still involved with her but about to marry his fiance. Vivian keeps on hoping that he will see she is the right one even though she is the other woman. She deparately needs him to do that to erase the fact she was betrayed by her ex-boyfriend who did leave her for the other woman.
I was just speaking my mind. I was trying to help her see the one right way out of this sticky situation was to leave him and get herself out of this bad cycle. She was talking about all sorts of things like ruining his life by telling his fiance. That's just a childish tactic (revenge) and will not help her heal. So I was honest with her and I told her she was being childish.
She took it to heart. She was very much hurt. She says she did not yell at me when I was being unreasonable complaining Noel doesn't call me everyday.
On the hind side, I wish she did. Perhaps I would wake up earlier and realized I was being unreasonable (I did realized my problem lies else where). On the other hand, I might react as defensive as she is.
What has this whole interacting taught me?
Was I being too honest and not consider the other person's feeling?
I do know I am not tactically enough. When I see the answer to something I just tell the other person. As I learn in the psych class that's not the way a child (or adult) learns. They don't learn by you giving them all the explaination at once. They learn by you giving them little hints and explaination and time. A lot of time to digest and then perhaps they will ask for more explaination.
Realizing the answer is far more powerful then taught the answer. Please remember this Jasmine.
Perhaps that's what went wrong with the conversation with mom. I was too eager to share answer with her. So it's not her fault she got defensive. I should not tell her not to get defensive. I need to stop being so offensive in my speaking and attitude.
I still don't like how she accepted the apology. I still think she is rude. But I have right to my opinion.
She might be kinder and polite and not offending and speaks with her guy everyday, but Noel is the one that married me and helping me find myself better.
I was just speaking my mind. I was trying to help her see the one right way out of this sticky situation was to leave him and get herself out of this bad cycle. She was talking about all sorts of things like ruining his life by telling his fiance. That's just a childish tactic (revenge) and will not help her heal. So I was honest with her and I told her she was being childish.
She took it to heart. She was very much hurt. She says she did not yell at me when I was being unreasonable complaining Noel doesn't call me everyday.
On the hind side, I wish she did. Perhaps I would wake up earlier and realized I was being unreasonable (I did realized my problem lies else where). On the other hand, I might react as defensive as she is.
What has this whole interacting taught me?
Was I being too honest and not consider the other person's feeling?
I do know I am not tactically enough. When I see the answer to something I just tell the other person. As I learn in the psych class that's not the way a child (or adult) learns. They don't learn by you giving them all the explaination at once. They learn by you giving them little hints and explaination and time. A lot of time to digest and then perhaps they will ask for more explaination.
Realizing the answer is far more powerful then taught the answer. Please remember this Jasmine.
Perhaps that's what went wrong with the conversation with mom. I was too eager to share answer with her. So it's not her fault she got defensive. I should not tell her not to get defensive. I need to stop being so offensive in my speaking and attitude.
I still don't like how she accepted the apology. I still think she is rude. But I have right to my opinion.
She might be kinder and polite and not offending and speaks with her guy everyday, but Noel is the one that married me and helping me find myself better.
Monday, October 24, 2005
I hope this is the right choice
I hope we can get the apartment at cypress point without problem. I hope the land lady will fix the things in apartment and I hope Noel can safely bike to work without me worrying much. I hope I will learn to like the appliance in the apartment, not complain of it not being the newest but appreciate it's durable and usable and not creating unwanted garbage in the landfill. I hope I can do a good job finding good place for all our belonging (including the iron shelf) and make a beautiful, peaceful living environment for anybody that visits.
I need to stop worrying like Rick says. He's a great guy. I guess I worry because it's my comfort zone. What would my Behaviorism class professor say about this situation?
Thank you for watching over me, my mom, our family and rest of everybody.
I need to stop worrying like Rick says. He's a great guy. I guess I worry because it's my comfort zone. What would my Behaviorism class professor say about this situation?
Thank you for watching over me, my mom, our family and rest of everybody.
Friday, October 21, 2005
What to focus on
I might not completely and whole heartedly understand the realm of Behaviorism, or believe it can solve every world problem, but I do admit it helps me to know myself better and work with myself better.
I realized I am more sensitive to punishment then reinforcement. It must have to do with the chinese upbringing. It's a world revolves around punishment. I guess knowing that is good because it's half of the battle.
Now I can tackle on what I need to do. I realized I dread my to-do list because I just focus on the not-fun part of it and not focusing on when I finish how great I feel. My todo list needs to change from the process to emphasis the result. After all, isn't that what marketing people do with all the ads? That should be enough to motivate me, to get me going instead of procrastinating.
Let's change "Go through bookmarks" to "Knowing your favorite bookmarks and be able to access it easily! :-)"
I need to be my own cheerleader!
I realized I am more sensitive to punishment then reinforcement. It must have to do with the chinese upbringing. It's a world revolves around punishment. I guess knowing that is good because it's half of the battle.
Now I can tackle on what I need to do. I realized I dread my to-do list because I just focus on the not-fun part of it and not focusing on when I finish how great I feel. My todo list needs to change from the process to emphasis the result. After all, isn't that what marketing people do with all the ads? That should be enough to motivate me, to get me going instead of procrastinating.
Let's change "Go through bookmarks" to "Knowing your favorite bookmarks and be able to access it easily! :-)"
I need to be my own cheerleader!
Sunday, October 16, 2005
Anterior Cingulate
I understood the idea of behaviorism after the first lecture, but I certainly had a deeper understanding after few more sessions. Professor Hall argues it from many different point of view and that certainly helped deepen the understanding. However, I find myself forming the opposite stand from him. He think that if any field of psychology should be eliminated, it should be cognitive psychology. I think if there's any branch of psychology I am mostly interested, that would be it.
Why?
Well, there isn't much to behaviorism. Yes, it's all based on the very straight forward concept of Law of Effect by Thorndike. But that's not magical. So what if you can explain "anterior cingulate by the following:
"Although the functions of the anterior cingulate are very complex, broadly speaking it acts as a conduit between lower, somewhat more impulse-driven brain regions and higher, somewhat more thought-driven behaviors. The Stroop effects sensitivity to changes in brain function may be related to it's association with the anterior cingulate." "The Stroop Test provides insight into cognitive effect that are experienced as a result of attentional fatigue"
Yes, you can explains the whole "Stroop Test" by saying because we are conditioned to read the word instead of the color of the word, but how does that help me refer to what's happening in the brain. Yes, you can explain everything by "it's doing this because it's used to getting that result", but that doesn't give me a specific of referring to the brain function.
Behaviorism criticize mentalism's use of mind, intelligent and other things it cannot observe and considers unnatural. If all other philosopher were like that, not using their imagination to explain the observed, then no other science would have been burn. As the technology advances, we can see that some of the assumptions by scientist were able to be proven correct. Did not Einstein form his theories before they were proven able?
To answer the question Professor Hall asks in class: How much of what a person becomes is nature vs. nurture? I think it's more nature then nurture. How do you explain things like attention to detail? How do you explain some people's brain just cranks slower then other? I just think nature has more of an impact then nurture.
I just find it more interesting to know human nature and use that as a tool to uncover other things then working to change people's behavior. Perhaps it's because it's usually harder to change people's behavior? Unless you have a great dominance of people's environment. But knowing people's nature will aid as a tool to change that person's environment then behavior.
Ultimately, in my opinion, the law of effect and other behaviorism ideas is just a small equation in the whole world of psychology.
Why?
Well, there isn't much to behaviorism. Yes, it's all based on the very straight forward concept of Law of Effect by Thorndike. But that's not magical. So what if you can explain "anterior cingulate by the following:
"Although the functions of the anterior cingulate are very complex, broadly speaking it acts as a conduit between lower, somewhat more impulse-driven brain regions and higher, somewhat more thought-driven behaviors. The Stroop effects sensitivity to changes in brain function may be related to it's association with the anterior cingulate." "The Stroop Test provides insight into cognitive effect that are experienced as a result of attentional fatigue"
Yes, you can explains the whole "Stroop Test" by saying because we are conditioned to read the word instead of the color of the word, but how does that help me refer to what's happening in the brain. Yes, you can explain everything by "it's doing this because it's used to getting that result", but that doesn't give me a specific of referring to the brain function.
Behaviorism criticize mentalism's use of mind, intelligent and other things it cannot observe and considers unnatural. If all other philosopher were like that, not using their imagination to explain the observed, then no other science would have been burn. As the technology advances, we can see that some of the assumptions by scientist were able to be proven correct. Did not Einstein form his theories before they were proven able?
To answer the question Professor Hall asks in class: How much of what a person becomes is nature vs. nurture? I think it's more nature then nurture. How do you explain things like attention to detail? How do you explain some people's brain just cranks slower then other? I just think nature has more of an impact then nurture.
I just find it more interesting to know human nature and use that as a tool to uncover other things then working to change people's behavior. Perhaps it's because it's usually harder to change people's behavior? Unless you have a great dominance of people's environment. But knowing people's nature will aid as a tool to change that person's environment then behavior.
Ultimately, in my opinion, the law of effect and other behaviorism ideas is just a small equation in the whole world of psychology.
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
In the mood for love
I saw "In the mood for love" for the second time on IFC. I was very impressed by 2046 and couldn't believe how boring I though the "mood" was. Wanted to see what I missed. I realized I wasn't impressed by the "mood" first time because I did not get it. That's why I thought it boring. Everything was very subtle. So delicate that you miss it if you weren't paying full attention.
I learned to love the subtle things this time around. For example, I love the simplicity of buying noodle soup in that era, where they bring their own container. So much more intimate then the disposable containers we have now that's creating too much garbage. I love Maggie Chueng's figure. Loved how chi-pow looks so great on her and how the neck of the dress was just a bit longer to accentuate her beautiful elongated neck.
Beautiful. I would consider owning the movie.
I learned to love the subtle things this time around. For example, I love the simplicity of buying noodle soup in that era, where they bring their own container. So much more intimate then the disposable containers we have now that's creating too much garbage. I love Maggie Chueng's figure. Loved how chi-pow looks so great on her and how the neck of the dress was just a bit longer to accentuate her beautiful elongated neck.
Beautiful. I would consider owning the movie.
Monday, September 19, 2005
Still has New York time..
My watch still has new york time set....can't get myself to change it yet. Enough things around here that has local time anyway.
Just can't quite let go yet...
Just can't quite let go yet...
Thursday, September 15, 2005
One Way Ticket
I know it would hit me some how. I started to feel small nostalgia through out the house. Took picture from my favorite spot in the house. Miss all the things I used to do in the house. Have to remind myself that my work schedule did not allow me to do more of the things I like to do. For every good thing I had to remind myself the not so good things, so it's possible for me to leave the house.
Mom came to see us off. She was emotional when we the car was driving away. I was surprised that I did not get as emotional. Maybe it's because I've trained myself to not show emotions around mom?
I thought the take off of airplane would be the time that hits me, but it did not. I was a bit busy feeling nervous. I always get nervous and reach for Noel's hand when the plane takes off or land.
Then we watched a sappy girl movie on the plane. I shet some tears for the movie. At the end of the movie was when I lost it. It just hit me that we left our house. That thought hit me like big truck. The image of the empty house was just too much for me to handle. I think Noel noticed something wasn't right, but he let me kept on crying. A minute later I told him why I was crying; that we had left our home.
I felt a bit better after we step off the plane. Everthing was nice and pleasant. The weather was beautiful (make the new life feel promising). A bit on the cool side. The temp apartment was nice also. It help us settle down.
Everything will be okay. We are starting to know our way around and soon we should find our ways okay(the roads and the life here).
Mom came to see us off. She was emotional when we the car was driving away. I was surprised that I did not get as emotional. Maybe it's because I've trained myself to not show emotions around mom?
I thought the take off of airplane would be the time that hits me, but it did not. I was a bit busy feeling nervous. I always get nervous and reach for Noel's hand when the plane takes off or land.
Then we watched a sappy girl movie on the plane. I shet some tears for the movie. At the end of the movie was when I lost it. It just hit me that we left our house. That thought hit me like big truck. The image of the empty house was just too much for me to handle. I think Noel noticed something wasn't right, but he let me kept on crying. A minute later I told him why I was crying; that we had left our home.
I felt a bit better after we step off the plane. Everthing was nice and pleasant. The weather was beautiful (make the new life feel promising). A bit on the cool side. The temp apartment was nice also. It help us settle down.
Everything will be okay. We are starting to know our way around and soon we should find our ways okay(the roads and the life here).
Sunday, September 11, 2005
Get together weekend
It was great to have people come over. I made simple things but put them in pretty bowls and they look fancier all of the sudden.
It was great surprise for Carin to come with the kids. Would have been great if John came too but the two girls more then make up for John's obsense. They girls have grown so much. Skye doens't wear glasses any more and she's such a beautiful girl. Sierra is beautiful and so grown up. Does a great job taking care of her little sister.
David and Joanne came. Noel's ex-coworker from OpenLink stopped by: Simon and David. Very nice people. We celebrated Tony's birthday on Saturday. Joanne got a yummy chinese strawberry cake.
More people came on Sunday and Monday. Dean and Cris, John and Eileen. Makiyo came over too. She gives such approving tone of the house.
We saw Stacy in the city. She treated us to a healthy buffet place. I wish we had stay in tough more.
Saw Melinda and Andrew too. Too bad didn't see Mark and the dogs. But I'll see them next time I visit new york.
It was great surprise for Carin to come with the kids. Would have been great if John came too but the two girls more then make up for John's obsense. They girls have grown so much. Skye doens't wear glasses any more and she's such a beautiful girl. Sierra is beautiful and so grown up. Does a great job taking care of her little sister.
David and Joanne came. Noel's ex-coworker from OpenLink stopped by: Simon and David. Very nice people. We celebrated Tony's birthday on Saturday. Joanne got a yummy chinese strawberry cake.
More people came on Sunday and Monday. Dean and Cris, John and Eileen. Makiyo came over too. She gives such approving tone of the house.
We saw Stacy in the city. She treated us to a healthy buffet place. I wish we had stay in tough more.
Saw Melinda and Andrew too. Too bad didn't see Mark and the dogs. But I'll see them next time I visit new york.
Friday, September 09, 2005
Knitting as of late
I seem to spend more time thinking about knitting then actually knitting. I have so many projects I can do and still I go to yarn stores to see what I can find. Hoping to see some good quality yarn on sale or find the new project to work on.
I went to the yarn store in the UES because it was close to the gym. Very nice place. It's kinda place I like to have in my neighborhood, if I was filthy rich. The prices are higher then usual (by a dollar or so) and they sell the kind of yarn I like. Tucked away in a quiet street. I saw the most adorable baby sampler blanket. It's a mix of different patterns. I am sure if I was experienced enough I can use the pattern dictionary and come up with it. But at last I am not yet. The lady made it with two different yarns: merino wool and vintage cotton by Karabella. I was so in love with the cotton one. The sheen on the vintage cotton just shows off the different stitches so well! It's a store pattern they used and while I am not sure how well the instruction is, it's a better start for me then figure them out in the pattern dictionary. But I would have to purchase the yarn, which would cost about $150 ($10 each). They are certainly smart about combat the lowering price caused by the internet.
I went to the yarn store in the UES because it was close to the gym. Very nice place. It's kinda place I like to have in my neighborhood, if I was filthy rich. The prices are higher then usual (by a dollar or so) and they sell the kind of yarn I like. Tucked away in a quiet street. I saw the most adorable baby sampler blanket. It's a mix of different patterns. I am sure if I was experienced enough I can use the pattern dictionary and come up with it. But at last I am not yet. The lady made it with two different yarns: merino wool and vintage cotton by Karabella. I was so in love with the cotton one. The sheen on the vintage cotton just shows off the different stitches so well! It's a store pattern they used and while I am not sure how well the instruction is, it's a better start for me then figure them out in the pattern dictionary. But I would have to purchase the yarn, which would cost about $150 ($10 each). They are certainly smart about combat the lowering price caused by the internet.
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